Relaunch Mission Page 5

  Maybe nothing. The notes continued, and mentioned that the worm had originated after the peace accords. Many core colonists preferred to keep their pasts secret—himself included, though there was little data left on the man he had been before joining Alliance Intelligence’s special ops. Most of Gabriel’s records had been scrubbed and sanitized until the files virtually gleamed from electronic overload. The rest of the data about him that floated through the information ether was fabricated for various covers—doctored photos of families that never existed, tax records for jobs he had never worked, academic accolades from schools he had never attended. His relationship with Lindy had been one of the few truths in his life until he shattered it—his first successful assignment, as it were—and here he was about to lie to her again.

  With a sour grimace he sat back on his bunk. The mission was set; all he could do was go forward. A quick scan of the files on the rest of the Mombasa’s crew revealed updated annotations from his handler that speculated on threat levels, risk percentages, and ideas on who would be easiest to break. Gabriel’s most recent handler was an off-putting fellow who seemed to stare through everyone he spoke with, and Gabriel decided to make his own assessment of the crew. In the ship’s mess perhaps; the Mombasa didn’t have separate mess halls for crew and officers, so taking his meals with his new shipmates would allow him to get a better feel for them. Provided, of course, that no one poisoned his food or attempted to stab him with a fork.

  But for now, he had a great deal of reading to do. It was going to be a long, lonely night.

  Chapter Four

  Lindana stood at the end of the corridor outside of the officers’ quarters and scrambled for the courage to take the final few steps to Gabriel’s door. This is stupid. You’re the damn captain of this ship. You can check in on him. You’re supposed to check in on him. He’s your new damn intel officer. Just do it already and then you can check on Maria’s progress.

  Lindana took a deep breath and soldiered on. She tapped the announcer next to the door and waited until he bid her entry. Her heart thudded as she stepped into the room, and she folded her hands behind her back.

  “How are you settling in?” she asked. Ugh. Really? Could you be more cliché?

  Gabriel looked up from the book he had been reading—an honest to God antique book, leather bound with yellowing pages. Well damn, they probably could have sold that to refuel the engines. Lindana made a mental note in case of future financial distress. His mirrored glasses were folded atop his desk, giving her a clear view of the sickly yellowish bruise left by Tomas’s fist. She should have felt bad about that, but she didn’t. She wished she’d hit the bastard herself.

  “Quite well, thank you.”

  “I tried to access your personnel file but Command has most of it classified. Where was your last assignment?”

  “It’s classified,” he reminded her sheepishly.

  “So you can’t tell me where you’ve been the past few years?” Great, Lindy. Let’s keep going down the cliché path. Why don’t you ask him if he ever loved again while you’re at it? Or if he ever thinks about you?

  “I can tell you that it is no longer where I want to be.” Gabriel paused to study her. “Are you willing to speak with me now? Should I be prepared for another trip to the medical bay? Though I’m not entirely certain that your brother will mend my nose if you rebreak it.”

  “Tomas understands his duty. You’re a member of this crew, and he has a responsibility to heal you.” Lindana glanced around for a spot to sit, and decided to take the offensive by perching on the edge of his bunk. See? I can sit on your bed and not think about the mind-blowing sex we used to have. She folded her hands in her lap. “Go ahead. I’m listening.”

  “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I want you to know that I have regretted my words every day since.”

  Lindana placed a hand over her heart as though experiencing palpitations. “Wow. You fixed it! Everything is better now! Allahu akbar! It’s a miracle!”

  Gabriel scowled, his pale brow pinched with irritation. “You don’t believe me.”

  “It doesn’t matter if I believe you. You could be the most sincere person in the history of sincerity, but that doesn’t mean a damn thing. You hurt me. And not a broken nose hurt that can be mended with a bone knitter. You destroyed me. You scarred me in ways that never healed, that fundamentally changed me as a person and altered the course of my life. I never trusted anyone the way I trusted you. So if you’re looking for forgiveness, I don’t have it.”

  “I lied. Not in the way that you believe. I betrayed your trust, but I lied to you about how and why.”

  “And...? Isn’t that just splitting hairs? You lied either way.”

  “The truth doesn’t excuse my actions, but it’s important to me that you know it. That you understand my motive.”

  “To what end?” she asked. How could he be so calm? He was as placid as a life insurance salesman about to discuss her coverage options, not a former lover about to reveal a terrible sin. Maybe she should rebreak his nose. “And why do you think I’d believe you? You don’t have a good track record with being honest with me. Or anyone, really. Intelligence officers aren’t known for their candor. You lie for a living.”

  Gabriel nodded slowly. “I don’t expect you to believe me.”

  “So this is, what? To help you sleep better at night? I’m not exactly invested in that.”

  The corners of his mouth twitched. “Well, you are my captain. It is in your best interest to have a well-rested intel officer.”

  Lindana laughed, though there was little mirth in the sound. It was obvious that he was determined to vomit forth his lame apology, so she might as well let him.

  “Point,” she said. “Go on.”

  “I never participated in the contest,” he said.

  Lindana’s stomach dropped as her blood drained, leaving her cold and lightheaded. That was not what she expected to hear—she was prepared for a “I learned my lesson” or “I’ll never do it again,” but not that.

  Gabriel took a deep breath and continued. “There was a contest, of course. There’s always been a contest. It’s a sick tradition of the fraternity that goes back centuries. I never approved of it. I thought it was barbaric to reduce an encounter with another person to a points value. But the contest provided the perfect cover story for...” He trailed off and cleared his throat.

  Lindana knew she was supposed to say something—a question, words in English, something coherent. Instead she waited for him to continue.

  “They approached me after my father died. Do you recall when I attended his funeral?” Gabriel asked.

  “Your father?” she blurted, confused. Lindana had met him once. She had a vague recollection of a heavyset man with salt-and-pepper hair and a constant scowl. Gabriel had left for two weeks to attend the funeral. “Yes, I remember. What of it?”

  “He was a rotten bastard. He’d driven the family fortune into the ground. Bad investments at first, then a drug addiction devoured the rest. All that was left was the land and our title, as well as several large debts. Father owed money to dangerous people, and I...” Gabriel scowled and looked away, holding his face in his hands as though the weight of the memories pulled him down. “I let the fear of it get to me, and they used that fear against me.”

  “Who is they?” It sounded unnecessarily ominous.

  “Intelligence Special Tasks Force.”

  “Oh.” Lindana swallowed. Well damn. As an intel officer he obviously worked for the UADN Intelligence Agency, but Special Tasks was serious shit. Assassinations, espionage, all the dirty deeds that Alliance Command disavowed official knowledge of. Classified was an understatement.

  “I was perfect for them,” Gabriel said. “I had a prestigious core colonist pedigree that would open many political doors that they were eager
to peer behind, and I had a weakness to exploit. STF promised to pay off the debts in return for my service.”

  “Bastards. They blackmailed you.”

  “It didn’t seem like it at the time. It seemed like salvation. I was drowning beneath that debt, and I was afraid of living poor.”

  “I’ve lived poor. A lot of people survive it just fine. I’d rather live poor and have love than be rich and an asshole. But that’s just me.” Lindana shrugged, though her eyes burned and her voice dropped a rough octave thanks to the emotion knotting her throat.

  “You’re right. I knew you would say that, and I was too cowardly to risk hearing it. Instead I took the STF’s bargain. I thought...well, I was naïve. It seemed like a great adventure—joining Intelligence was a chance to do real, hands-on work to protect the Alliance. Generations of my family served without firing a single shot. We just glared at the enemy through viewports, across the black—”

  Lindana snorted. “Until the war.”

  “Until the war. As a result of which I lost the estate I was attempting to save. Irony.”

  “Karma’s a bitch.”

  “Indeed.” Gabriel grimaced. “I signed on to protect the Alliance from the Soviets, not to fight our own colonists. I’m not...proud of my service during the rebellion, but wanted to honor my commitment to the Alliance, so I stayed with them.”

  “I don’t think anyone’s proud of what they did in the war.” She knew Tomas still had nightmares about the horrors he witnessed—of all the people he couldn’t save. It was terrible, but the core colonist rebellion was a smaller-scale example of the horrors that would be unleashed if the Alliance and the Soviets truly clashed in an all-out war.

  Gabriel waved the topic away. “My point is I had no idea what sort of danger I was getting into by joining special tasks, but my mentor did. She ordered me to cut ties with you. Completely. Otherwise you would never be safe from the things I did. That is why I lied to you. To protect you.”

  “To protect me?” Lindana rose and shoved his chest, and Gabriel flinched, eyes wide as she loomed over him. “Do I look like I need your damn protection? Like I’m some soft-handed damsel who needs rescuing? No. You chose money over love, and then you were a complete prick to me out of some macho need to ensure my safety. Congratulations. Your evil plan worked. Heart broken, mission accomplished. Do you want a fucking achievement medal?”

  “Of course not.” He stood and faced her. Why did he have to be so bloody tall? He had at least six inches on her. She should start wearing her high-heeled boots again. They were impractical but badass.

  “Are we done here?” Lindana asked. “I have shit to do. Everyone works on this ship. Including you.”

  “Please, hear me out. I don’t know if she was right, that breaking it off kept you safe. All I know is that I did things. Terrible things, Lindy. Things no one should ever do, but I followed orders and did what the STF deemed necessary for the good of the Alliance. Perhaps I was successful in making things better, I don’t know. There was a time when I was sure that I was doing the right thing, but lately it feels as though my time with the STF only netted me scars, nightmares, regrets and more lies than I could ever hope to keep straight. I needed to break away from that, and I needed to tell you the truth. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but you were the one good thing that ever happened to me. I never found anyone who made me feel as you did.”

  “Sucks to be you, then.”

  He blinked. Damn those long lashes. Why did he have to be so pretty? Lindana had fallen for those soulful blue eyes hook, line and sinker. It hadn’t helped that Gabriel looked like every fairy tale prince in every story she had read—tall, dark and handsome, with sculpted cheekbones and a regal posture. Gabriel Steele was born to wear a crown. Lindana Nyota was born to be a thief.

  “You said your piece,” Lindana said. “Unless you have other sins to confess, I’m leaving now.”

  “Wait!” Gabriel reached for her, but Lindana snatched her hand away.

  “Why? Did you think you’d tell your sad story and I’d swoon and fall into your arms?” She placed a hand against her forehead. “Oh, Gabriel! You broke my heart for noble reasons, so now I must forgive you. No. Fuck you. I am the captain of this goddamn ship and I don’t need you.”

  “You’re right, you don’t. You are the strongest, bravest, most beautiful woman I have ever known.”

  Heat zinged through her body down to her curling toes, and Lindana licked her lips as her heart raced. She thought of all the nights she’d dreamt of Gabriel begging for her forgiveness. Of him groveling on his knees like a worm, reduced to a hollow shell of a man because of what he had done to her. Now he was here, flesh and blood—fifteen years late, but apologetic. The scene didn’t have the triumphant satisfaction of her dreams; instead, the moment was filled with twisted, conflicting emotions.

  “Why are you here?” she asked softly. “Was this Command’s decision, or yours?”

  “Mine. I requested this transfer.”

  “So you’re staying.”

  “Yes. Provided, of course, that you don’t space me out an airlock.” Gabriel took her hands in his. He was warm and solid, and she swayed slightly. Then she glared at him and set her jaw in a stern line. Lindana poked him in the chest.

  “Don’t tempt me. You’re still an asshole. This doesn’t mean I believe you, or that I—”

  He interrupted her with a hungry kiss that stole her ability to think. Gabriel took her face in his hands and kissed her as though he was dying of thirst and Lindy was the last drink of water in existence. For a moment she whimpered, caught in a wave of oh God yes, but when reality reasserted itself she pushed him back against the desk.

  “This is my ship,” she snarled. “I’m not a starry-eyed virgin anymore. You don’t get to sweep in here with your killer cheekbones and your soulful eyes and charm my panties off.”

  “Soulful eyes?” Gabriel’s mouth twitched in a suppressed smile.

  “Oh shut up, you know what I mean.” Lindana scowled. Gabriel wrapped his arms around her and drew her close. “I can rebreak your nose.”

  “You won’t.”

  “No?”

  “No.” His hands slipped beneath the hem of her shirt, his fingers cold as they slid up the bare skin of her back. Her breath caught as her heart pounded. “You won’t. My heart perhaps.”

  “Assuming you have one,” Lindana muttered. “I hate you.”

  “I know.”

  Gritting her teeth, Lindana took a sharp step back, out of reach. “I don’t trust you. Trust is earned, and you’re sure as hell not earning it on your back.” Gabriel smirked, and she cut him off before he could comment. “You’re not earning it in any sexual position, no matter how creative. Nor will any amount of heated kisses or screaming orgasms erase your past misconduct, so get that out of your mind right now.”

  “Understood. Anything else?”

  Lindana scowled. “Just do your job. We literally can’t afford to screw this mission up.”

  Something shadowed Gabriel’s gaze for a moment, but then he nodded. “Of course, Captain.”

  * * *

  Lindana’s shoulders hunched as she stalked back to her quarters. Gabriel was up to something, she was sure of it. Much as she’d like to believe that he’d come here just for her, there had to be another reason Gabriel had traveled all the way out to the ragged edge to serve on a privateer ship. No one simply walked away from the Special Tasks Force—if you left, it was in a body bag.

  Lindana rounded a corner and collided with Tomas. “Ow! What are you—?” She paused and studied her brother with suspicious eyes. “Are you going to the engine room?”

  “No. Yes. Maybe.”

  She poked him in the chest. “You are banned from the engine room. Is there a medical emergency there?”

  “N
o.”

  “Were you invited?”

  “No...” Tomas winced, looking sheepish.

  “Go back to the med bay. Now.”

  “Why do you hate fun?”

  “That’s why they pay me the big money. Because I am the enemy of fun. In fact, I have work for you.”

  Tomas faked a pout. “Peeling potatoes?”

  “Don’t tempt me. I want you to break into Command’s database and access Gabriel’s service record. The whole damn thing is classified except for his name and date of birth. I need to know what he’s hiding. And check his financials. He says he’s broke, but I want more than his word.”

  “Wait, where were you coming from?” he asked. “Aren’t you supposed to be in the cockpit?”

  Lindy quirked a brow—had he memorized her schedule? Was Tomas trying to sneak into the engine room when she wasn’t around to stop him? “I’m the captain. I go wherever I want. Right now I’m going to the engine room, and you’re going back to the med bay and do that research. That’s an order.”

  “Were you just with him?”

  Lindana sighed. “We spoke. He apologized, which isn’t worth a rat’s ass. That’s it.” Except for the kiss, which left her lips tingling as though she had slammed a shot of hot sauce. Tomas’s fists clenched, and Lindana hugged her brother until he relaxed. “It’s okay. I’m okay. But you’re not going to be okay if you set foot in the engine room.”

  * * *

  Gabriel banged his head against the closed door until the pain in his skull outweighed the ache in his groin. Idiot. He knew better. Months—no, years—of training and experience on the most efficient ways to win an argument, to seduce a target to your side, and all of that had vanished from his mind after two minutes alone with Lindy. He took a steadying breath and cursed at the lingering scent of her that still perfumed the air. Just one kiss from Lindana unraveled him; he was undone, helpless like a green recruit set against a foe far beyond his reckoning.